Welcome to the Criffs of Insanity! She's crass, she's loud, she's obnoxious....but she's got a neat & tidy linen closet. These are the rantings of Keebler Jen...careful...watch out for hot lava.



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Name: jeni
Location: Norwalk, California, United States

who am i? i'm a mom (got 5), a girlfriend (got 1), an ex-wife (got 1), a sister (got 2), a hell of a friend (got a few) & a should-have-been southern belle (will have a plantation one day...). i'm what you would call compulsive about my linen closet & i have an unnatural attachment to my cat fred.

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The current mood of jenimoo at www.imood.com

D'oh!

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Prior Keebler Rants

  • Friday Four..but delayed to Saturday
  • Thursday Thirteen.....
  • just
  • moving news....
  • WTG MOMMA!!
  • diet dilemma
  • Grandma's Cures
  • alright....
  • Thursday Thirteen.....
  • its time....

Older Rants

  • November 2005
  • December 2005
  • January 2006
  • February 2006
  • March 2006
  • Books on my nightstand

  • The Historian - Elizabeth Kostova
  • A Time for Freedom - Lynne Cheney
  • Family--The ties that bind & gag! - Erma Bombeck
  • If life is a bowl of cherries...what am i doing in the pits? - Erma Bombeck
  • Rise, Let Us Be On Our Way - John Paul II
  • dates that are important to me

  • January 1 - New Years Day
  • January 4 - Daddy Henry's Birthday
  • January 20 - Grandma Maria's Birthday
  • January 20 - Aunt Kathe's Birthday
  • February 2 - Groundhog Day
  • February 5 - Super Bowl XL
  • February 11 - Thaddeus' Birthday
  • February 14 - Valentine's Day
  • March 17 - St. Patty's Day
  • March 29 - Grandpa Horace's Birthday
  • April 1 - April Fools Day
  • April 1 - Kristin's Birthday
  • April 4 - Lea Caroline's Birthday
  • May 1 - Auntie Kristin's Birthday
  • May 3 - Grandma Annie's Birthday
  • May 18 - Nana's Birthday
  • May 14 - Mother's Day
  • May 29 - Memorial Day
  • June 4 - Daddy Dale's Birthday
  • June 18 - Father's Day
  • July 4 - Independence Day
  • July 24 - Nana & Papa's Anniversary
  • August 4 - Jacob Ethan's Birthday
  • August 21 - Grandma Dona's Birthday
  • August 22 - Gabe's Birthday
  • September 4 - Labor Day
  • September 17 - Grandma Dona & Grandpa Horace's Anniversary
  • October 2 - Tanya's Birthday
  • October 10 - Grandpa Dennis' Birthday
  • October 26 - Papa's Birthday
  • October 31 - Halloween
  • October 31 - Grandpa Ken's Birthday
  • November 8 - Uncle Bubba's Birthday
  • November 15 - Jenette's Birthday
  • November 23 - Happy Turkey Day
  • November 25 - Jen's hatching day
  • December 20 - Claudia's Birthday
  • December 24 - Christmas Eve
  • December 25 - Christmas Day
  • December 31 - New Years Eve
  • keep your closets clean! :)

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Sunday, January 15, 2006

i swear...

ever get the feeling that you're supposed to be someone else?? some days i feel like lady liberty.

"...give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses. yearning to be free"

well, i don't know all about the poor thing....but it should say the sick & infirmed.

i honestly don't know what goes on over at my ex-husbands house. i really don't. but every single time i get the kids back from there, someone is sick. and they flee to mom for comfort, solace, gatorade & tylenol.

this weekend alone, i've had: stomach flu (2 bouts), asthma attacks (2 bouts), fevers (2 bouts) and a migraine.

and a creepy sidenote about my eldest, claudia. who in the world can yak while they sleep & not wake up? i swear, she's from an alien planet. that child could sleep through a nuclear holocaust. you could have the NY philharmonic playing "Stars & Stripes Forever" next to her head & she wouldn't stir.

i need to take a tylenol.

posted by jeni at 12:00 PM

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reprint with permission only.


sure i'm funny. and hell's yeah, i've got some funny shit on here. but it's MINE.
not even "THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!" will save your rear.